Negotiation, not supervision
After reading Hsu Yu-min’s letter about parents’ rights to supervise their children (Letters, Oct. 28, page 8), I, as an assistant professor who needs to guide students with their learning activities, have a different take on the issue.
There is certainly a new conflict of interests between parents and their children. Parents pay for their children’s tuition and would be informed of their academic performance. However, students would like to gain full autonomy and freedom without having to report to their parents because they have been granted full citizenship over the age of 18. Both parents and children must take full responsibility.
Parents do not have to take control of their children’s performance by demanding to look at their academic reports. They have to respect their children’s right to privacy. Thus, I recommend that parents learn to control their emotions to improve their communications skills so that their children would have more willingness to discuss matters related to their studies if needed. Second, parents must use efficient negotiation skills to help their children solve any problems related to the payment of their education and other administrative matters.
When children agree to enter university, they should take full responsibility to go to class regularly, complete their assignments on time and fulfill their promise to graduate. Children should communicate with their parents when they ask reasonable questions regarding their studies. As parents have invested a large sum of money for their children’s study, it is the parents’ rights to ask questions to be informed about their children’s schooling situation. Nevertheless, children should provide a reasonable excuse if they do not want to provide information to their parents.
Thus, the job of parenting is not an easy one as their children have gained awareness about their rights. There is no discussion needed when everything goes smoothly. Parents and children only need serious discussions when problems crop up. It is thus imperative that both parents and children develop good communication skills to solve problems efficiently. That way, children would agree to provide relevant information to their parents regarding their academic performance.
David Blasco
New Taipei City
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